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Alarm bells sounding for Everton

Everton
Read

Modern football is rubbish

It's rubbish. Football that is. And with this book you are left in no doubt that everything about 'The Beautiful Game' has got worse over the past few decades.

Modern Football Is Rubbish: An A-Z of All That Is Wrong with the Beautiful Game is a kind of half-rant and half-analysis of the way the football has declined. The perma-tans, the diving, the billionaires who care little about actually watching a game as long as they've made some money - it all gets a good going over.

Filled with a nostalgic twang, the book is well ordered in the sense that you can dip into it and it doesn't require a great deal of attention to get to the heart of what they are trying say.

Essentially, the authors are bemoaning the fact that there are no longer piss soaked terraces or the regular Saint and Greavsie slot on the box. Everything from Roy of the Rovers to Panini sticker albums is considered in a look back at the stuff that was once great with the game.

Of course it is well crafted, as instead of being a book about what was good about football, it deals with everything that has gone wrong - multi-coloured boots, replica shirts and prawn sandwiches included.

The comical account of the ways in which foreign investment and exorbitant transfer fees have ruined the game are actually 'laugh out loud' funny, and you don't even have to be an old codger to appreciate the humour.

One of the funniest parts, without ruining it, is the 'Forgotten Smells of Football' section. Which is probably best left to the imagination before you get hold of a copy.

Mostly, this book is written in jest and pokes fun at what the game has become. But sometimes, it really does make you wonder what has happened. Well worth a read.

•  Pick yourself up a copy from here.