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Tonnies' five-minute hat trick

1959-2017
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GERMAN 2. BUNDESLIGA

2017/2018 Season

POS TEAM W D L PTS
14 SSV Jahn Reg 3 0 7 9
15 MSV Duisburg 2 3 5 9
16 Heidenheimer 2 2 7 8
View Full Table »
 By Chris Wright

Duisburg hit post FOUR times in one madcap goalmouth scramble

MSV Duisburg conceded twice within the first six minutes before eventually slumping to a 3-1 away defeat against Fortuna Dusseldorf in the German second tier on Monday evening.

However, the visitors did at least try to mount a comeback after the interval, only to somehow manage to hit the woodwork four times in the space of 2.5 seconds.

To hit the post once, maybe twice is unlucky. To hit the post four times in the same goalmouth flurry is just plain old bonkers.

The result saw Dusseldorf cement...

Michael Tonnies 1959-2017: The man who scored a five-minute hat trick

Michael Tonnies
Michael Tonnies has died at the age of 57.

Behind him, some players fight for the ball as a souvenir but Michael Tonnies isn't bothered. Sporting a classic 1990s mullet and a moustache, which badly needs shaving, the MSV Duisburg forward has just scored five goals in his side's 6-2 win against Karslruher SC -- and he set up the other one too.

On his 80th minute substitution, the 31-year-old is given a standing ovation by around 15,000 fans at Duisburg's Wedaustadion and is now talking to a reporter on the edge of the pitch with a blanket...